This “gem” was sent in by Sean O’Donoghue-Hayes back in 2002. I’ve had a few others sent in since then, but there was nowhere on the old site really appropriate to publish them. That’s all changed now!
So if you feel moved to McGonagallian verse on any subject, get in touch and I’ll publish it here.
In Honourandum of William McGonagall 1830-1902
U’ll be so uncouth,
Not to know grand McGonagall,
The greatest poet of them all!
He was a scholar of little regard,
Who did not let his discourse retard,
Spake on things of the everyday,
And gave the common man poetic say.
The glory of his words enshrined,
Are the fact by structure or rhyme not undermined,
He sought only to express himself to all,
The rich, the poor, short or tall.
It was Spike Milligan who re-dug him up,
And brought him to us who on such things sup,
Allow the world to again express amazement,
At McGonagall’s word enslavement.
That Tay bridge disaster of which he reports did so happen,
And his poem follows the official report almost exacten,
Oft this tee-totalling poet would perform to the Scottish lad and lass,
To make of more amusement they would alcoholically lace his drinking glass.
No, forsooth do not cast a stone at fair Will McGonagall,
He did not allow pure lack of talent to block him at all,
He expressed himself as well as the wayward muse allows,
Ol’ McGonagall was a bull where we quiet mice in the herd are only cows.